‘Kat, you have a problem’

Yes I have indeed and it’s serious, I tell you I just realized it.
I met my friends Mel, Matt and Harrison last weekend. We went out in London East (Aldgate East) to ‘some’ random pub where some random friends celebrated birthday.
My both friends Matt and Harrison are ‘gay’ (sorry <3). And from Australia. As I mentioned before I really get along with gays – I love them and they love me. We have the most fun ever.
Example: Harrison and I sitting in pub on the sofa wondering why all people look so boring and why we look so ‘fab’ (of course ;). Then we played the game: pick the hottest GUY! So we played pick the hottest guy. There were no hot guys. The birthday boy ran around with a horse toy (you know those horse heads on sticks where you can pretend playing riding). The horse was pink but the guy wasn’t gay. So we decided he is just weird.
Harrison: “Kat, what boys do you fancy actually”
Me: “Boys who look like girls. Skinny, longish hair and skinny jeans”
Harrison:”You mean young looking boys”
Me (thinking a while): “Yes”
Harrison: “So you like guys who look like girls and look very young like when they’re 25 they look like 17?”
Me: “Well not THAT young-looking but yes”
Harrison:”What else do you like? Like dressing? So you like the Rock’nRoll Type with Tats and stuff”
Me: “No, I’m over Rock’n Roll Type hence last past relationship with a Rock’n Roll Type Music playing Guy. Turbulent. No thanks. I like when guys dressing more down and not dressing up. Like old black boots, old skinnies, old leather jacket… don’t know. I can’t handle when guy are like too dressed up. Boring”
Harrison:”Wait!!! You mean you like skinny guys, who look like girls, who look young and not dressing up? YOU HAVE A BIG BIG PROBLEM KAT! They are all gay”
Me: ” I know……”
Harrison: “OMG you really really have a problem here in London Kat”
Me:” Yes, I know – thank you! What shall I do? I will grow me a P”
Harrison:”Yes, you should”
After discussing ‘guys’ and staring at all those weird boring people and also staring at all the stuffed animals around us, we decided to leave and head towards Shoreditch. We got a cab from Liverpool Street to Shoreditch which seems absolute ridiculous to me!! Haha (well if you know London you know you could walk that bit in 15 minutes, not far).
We ended up in a really ‘gay’ place. I have never been ever in such a gay place in London. It wasn’t even in Shoreditch and I cannot remember the name of the club either but it was hilarious – depressing!
Ladies I swear, all guys looked like girls, wearing skinny jeans, nice hair and were just cool :( One made me a compliment. He said he liked my dress. Harrison said he loves me. We danced around and I lost my jacket and scarf 72163 mio times and every time some nice gay guy was tripping on my shoulder and said: ‘hiyaaaa darling! you lost your scarf!’ If it would have been a girl, they would have probably stamped on it haha!
I met a really nice guy from Sweden. He was beautiful. I asked him if he is gay and he said no (hi Christoffer, sorry if you read this ;). But I think he was gay (sorry again). He must be! Why should straight guys go in such a club? And he was nice and chatty. Two weeks ago I asked someone else I liked if he is gay (sorry for asking so obvious) and he said no. Then I saw his friends and stuff on Facebook and he was gay. I MEAN: WHATS THE POINT PRETENDING TO ME NOT BEING GAY? That’s just weird. I don’t get it. Bi?
Anyway. The place was such such fun! I was in Heaven and Hell at the same time.
We went back to Matt’s place had lots of wine and Matt and I was discussing Patti Smith and Courtney Love and how much we both love them. Mel was falling asleep while telling us a story. I went to bed and slowly noticed the wine wasn’t that good for me. So went to toilet and was sick for the first time after 3 years! Jesus … I felt asleep in my lovely dress.

xxx

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About Mistress

Don't stop dreaming - Don't stop Rock'n Roll - Don't stop being beautiful.
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